It’s Thanksgiving once again – time for humans, well – American ones anyway, to gather around their dinner tables, be thankful and then gorge themselves on turkey and other sundry items. We undead look upon this ritual in gleeful anticipation since for us, this is akin to lambs being fattened for the slaughter and it cuts down on our hunting efforts. For that, we thank you.
However, bear in mind that we are not merely callous observers at your doorstep, waiting for the proper moment to burst into your homes and wreak havoc. Oh no – we are thankful, too.
We at For Zombies are thankful for:
- Our state of near and total invincibility.
- No longer having to worry about our daily ablutions and where to perform them.
- Not having to floss. Ever.
- Dying with our boots on – many of our horde were not so lucky.
- Hospitals – or as we call them – buffets.
- Beer – yes – we still love our beer – oh gosh we do. We like it so much we made an instructional video.
- The end of civilization and all the ensuing panic.
- And of course – brains – delicious brains.
In the spirit of the season, we took a few moments from our busy schedule of hunting down our next meal and doled out some needed holiday related advice: